Free counter and web stats Zubaidah Arshad: The Buaianain - Part 2

12.7.15

The Buaianain - Part 2

Shay and I share a disturbing roller coaster relationship with each other. It was when I joined the company a few years back that Abdulaziz introduced me to him, and the relationship that was supposed to be good along the way, was tarnished by my stupid childish act. When you say women are harder to understand compared to men, you may want to give yourself a pretty hard knock on your head. Shay is the epitome of a super complex, super mystery guy. The only thing that is so not mysterious about him perhaps the fact that he is a fine-built, muscular, handsome man.

When Shay was away for two straight months, life in the office seemed weightless. I couldn't be sure whether it was because I didn't care, or because my heart was so swollen with anger (and with a little dilution of love dose) that his absence was nothing but godsend. It was easy to forget someone when that someone was not around, and it was easier that the multiple awkward encounters on the stairs, or on the hallway, or on the way to the cafeteria, were totally gone. But given my atrocious track record of getting back to the same pool of shit all over again, I met him in his office when he reported back for duty. He had a minor surgery, so I thought it was appropriate for me to give him a courtesy visit. It was fine at that particular time that he even spilled some of his well-kept hidden secrets. It went perfectly well for the first few days until I sent him a Whatsapp message telling him that he was important to me.

Things went downhill from that point onward, the episode of awkward encounters resumed in its supremacy. At one time, we crossed our paths on the hallway. He was from the left side of the building, while I on the other hand, was walking from another side of the building. The destination however was similar - the main exit door. I wanted to look at him but I couldn't. You know, when you met someone that you fond, but you were in a row with him and you were clueless and you were left dumbfounded to what your next move should be. I couldn't pass through the door, barely holding to my racing heart, let alone to get pass through the moment.

A few days ago, I had a lengthy talk with Asmida. She agreed and concluded that I was the one to blame, that I was the root cause for all the turmoil I faced with my opposite sex human interaction. As much as I wanted to disagree, I couldn't. I guess, this what will happen when you love someone a little bit too much.

Shay is somehow special to me. I think so. I would like to think so, even when he thinks the other way round. My problem with getting too involved in the early stage of friend(relation)ship needs to be looked upon. It has ruined a lot of my past relationships with other men. I can't continue to chase for people's love. I need to settle down and embark on a new journey. After all, my eggs won't last long. Someone needs to be born to be my legacy.

p/s: The Buaianain as the post title does not reflect the previous Al Buaianain. I found out that he is as jerk as Shay. I think even worse. That's all.


ZA

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