Free counter and web stats Zubaidah Arshad: You Left, Unnoticed

7.7.11

You Left, Unnoticed

Ten years from now, on this very evening, hands sprawl on the sand, overlooking the golden descending sun, I might still wonder the reasons why didn't I meet you earlier, when the chances were so astronomically enormous, when you were so fragile and when I was so in need of hands to cling onto.

Years to savor are shrinking, and yet there are still too many grounds that I need to give footprints. For all I know, I have been longing to travel with you, someone that is dear to my heart, perhaps you, the only person that I want right now.

When I told you that I love you yesterday, and this very evening, the hesitation was humongous. I couldn't tell whether what I did was right, but I know, at certain points in my life, I have to let you know how do I feel towards you. I refuse to be trapped in the emotions that I created myself, and I refuse to recreate your images that in the end were the pure imagination that were created in my subconscious mind.

Tell me, how should I know how do you feel about me. I mean, I have given you what I should give you, I have given you the callsigns that I think were so clear, you should grasp in seconds. Am I loony going for something that is not going to materialize? Am I too absorbed in this stupid hook-and-reel that I am actually stuck in limbo?

I know, over time, this will end. Horifically.

I know, when everything has faded, when the feeling is as weak as a broken bulb, another saga of Custard's trilogy will happen again. Except for this time, the actor is you. And me. And certain other people that I don't care.

This story is going to end soon. Liam is another figment of imagination that will disperse like a bubble in the thin air. Like water that is going to dry under the hot sun.

All that I know, that I have spent much of my time thinking about you. And one thing that I don't really know, whether you are thinking about me.

You are an imagery. So vivid.

So for that, I think I should leave the space that fills with your images alone. Alone, unattended.

It will be dark, but at least, I know that I won't put too much hope anymore.


ZA

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