Wake Up, Honey. I'm Hitting On You!

When you think you have someone attached to you, and he makes you a little bit special by sending and replying every single text you send, think back, it may not last.

It is like the fresh fruits we after on top of a cake. We chase for it, and tend to chew it slowly because it feels so good, we afraid it finishes too soon. And when all the toppings are finished, you dread for more, and you scream because you know you can't have it back, and remorse creeps into your heart with a little hush of "if I save a tiny bit, so that I can have it more after this, I think it would have been better", but those are all words of regrets, and now what you have on a plate is a whole cylindrical cake, waiting to be sliced up, and tasted, and you still know it tastes good without the toppings, but it will taste a little bit different. Dry at times, so to speak.

Over time, we may learn that this is what 'being nice' is all about. The interaction between two people of maybe one side hoping too much, and another side just 'being nice'. And alas, the other side might not know that he is just too nice to break your heart, so he plays along, and afraid that if he says something that he thinks might hurt you, he may lose you. Lose you as a friend. And as someone he thinks of so highly.

Thinking back, it may come as a problem for both sides. One thinks this way, and another one thinks another way. The interaction is happening but literally not mutual. It is like the physical link from story to another is missing, and one may want to keep it at her pace, and another one tryingly to divert the conversation to a less 'intimate' one. In anyway, both are happy and suffer at the same time. But who cares when what they wanted is actually a string of casual chat to kill up some free time?

It has been a little awkward these few days. And I am leaning to him, to make sure that he knows what I really want. I can't blame him if he can't catch the drift, because maybe he isn't really thinking about it, or maybe he just doesn't understand at all.

I know I am a little pushy sometimes, but I can't blame myself either. I have been alone for such a long time. I need someone to take care of me. I am just tired looking out for myself.


Popular posts from this blog

Artificial Hope

First and Last

Apartment 11B